The Mirror

lillyclareThis evening as I knelt on a folded, brown bath mat and reached into the tub to douse Lillian with another cup of tepid water, she looked intently at me and proudly chirped, “blue eyes.” She is getting so good at noticing little details. I am intrigued and a somewhat horrified of this little person becoming a mirror which reflects back interpretations of reality. Who am I in the eyes of this person I relentlessly love and yet get so frustrated with? The person whom I yell at and slap the wall in front of? Who am I reflected in the lenses of the person for whom I want the very best, but who inadvertently unearths my most deeply buried faults and sins?

Sometimes I need an infusion of patience and empathy.

What is it like encountering the world for the very first time and you are only two years old? When your delighted discoveries elicit a frown and disapproving tone?

Lord, give me patience.

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